I am actively looking for a new job now, it has been pretty conclusively proven to me that I am surplus to requirements at this point.
So we are opening a new store and over the last couple weeks as new hires have come on to be trained, my hours have dropped to accommodate them, this has been annoying, since no other manager and most of the other employees haven't had their hours cut, but since the new store was supposed to open next week I figured things would return to normal, and up until today according to the schedule it was going to.
Now there is some form of delay with the opening, so all those new employees need hours and only one store is available to work at. So sacrifices must be mad, by me primarily it seems, I am now working part time for some goddamn reason. Now I appreciate the nightmare that this whole deal makes for scheduling, but the fact that I am singled out for the greatest cuts implies to me that I am not considered someone whose happiness is a priority, which makes since of the three managers for the new store, two are family of the owners, and one is a close friend, so yeah.
I don't want to be the person first on the block, I have no confidence this will change and I have rent to pay. Fuck.
I mean, it isn't like I could even get a part time job somewhere else to make up for it, my schedule isn't predictable or reliable and my boss is unwilling to schedule around other jobs, so yeah.
I realize this looks like I am just complaining, and yeah, I am, I feel like I have that right. This is unacceptable and while I know it is at the mild end for unfair employer behavior, it doesn't make it right, and the fact that part of me still feels I should be grateful because it isn't worse is appalling.
At least tips have been good, they might just get me through the holidays.
Let's go ahead and tie this in to the stuff I have been talking about over the last couple of days. What exactly is there to be proud of in surviving another day in a job with little to no long term prospects that at times seems to actively not want you there? I wrote last night how my favorite part of the day is the drive home in large part because I have control over my environment during that drive, I am a manager but I don't feel like I control anything else about my work day. I cant save money, I can't pay off my debts, I can only tread water and hope that my boss doesn't decide to fuck me for some reason, and that hope isn't really paying off right now. Why should I or anyone in a position like mine have any sense of worth attached to their labor? It is clear that it is not valued by anyone else, so why bother trying?
That's my rant for the night, it is now my weekend so fuck it I am going to bed.
Wednesday, December 7, 2016
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